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My Kinda Quarantiner

by Heather Aubrey Lloyd




Every August, Heather is invited to participate in the Just This Guy song contest, affectionately known as "the monkey one." Writers are given a month to write and record, a topic, five words they have to get into the song, a few other details they need to include, and every year ... bonus points for getting "monkey" into the lyrics. 2020 is Heather's sixth year in the contest, where she's placed in the top three all but once, and won the top prize in 2018. Every other year she writes a serious song, and every other year, a funny one. This year, songwriters were required to do something on the upbeat side ... about the pandemic. Heather went for an Andrews Sisters-esque chipper homage to three of the most popular quarantine hobbies: baking, home improvement and gardening. Required words are in the lyrics in all caps.


Quarantiner #1
never thought it very fun
Slinging flour, baking powder and the like
But suddenly they felt the knead
For a little levity
Looked up a recipe to start that very night
You gotta feed it three times a day
They argued over names
Dough-Ba Fett and Quaran-Tina led the pack
You get a little less stir crazy
With a sourdough baby
Take it one dough at a time
And try to relax

Quarantiner #2
Knew exactly what to do
Those unfinished weekend projects
All the undone honey-do's, too.
But suddenly they felt the draw
To the hammer and the saw
Rang up dad to ask advice on types of glue
You gotta cut once, measure twice
If you want it to look nice
And some spackle tackles much around the HOME
You get a little less cabin fever
Shoring up your cantilever
We're all in this together
(And a level line is a joy forever!)

Come on over, baby
I'm a Jackie of all trades
you can have some MONKEY bread I baked
off the table that I built today
my hands are clean, my love is strong
Take off that MASK it's been too long!

Quarantiner #3
No green thumb in the family tree
yet UNPRECEDENTED vegetables
were dancing in their dreams
Suddenly they saw the chance
sent away for lots of plants
for a victory garden full of tasty greens
You gotta water it every day
if you want a nice bouquet
and some peas and quiet for your weary mind
You find you're a little less wilted
elbow deep in dirt and silt and
you'll be keeping that HOPE alive
in between the celery and chives
(Nice stems, by the way)

Come sit under my apple tree
Like we've never been APART
my hands are plenty busy
give me something for my heart
come sit under my apple tree
And say you're gonna stay
and be my kinda


released September 4, 2020
Written, recorded and performed by Heather Aubrey Lloyd
All vocals and percussion, Heather Aubrey Lloyd
August 2020 Home Demo


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Heather Aubrey Lloyd Baltimore, Maryland

Recovering reporter turned songwriter, Heather Aubrey Lloyd also co-fronts Baltimore’s ilyAIMY. Her 2017 solo release, “A Message in the Mess,” spotlights Lloyd’s emotive alto and a polished departure from her band’s alt-folk grit. Awards from the likes of No Depression Magazine, Telluride Troubadour, National Women’s Music Fest, etc. soon followed. Lloyd will release new music in late 2020. ... more

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